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multiple11-Nov-2003opinionpaulyw Gold Star Survey Creator Happy Birthday to Me unsorted59754.5%


What do you think of standing in the corner as a punishment? Is it a good punishment or not?

11Yes I think it is a good punishment. Standing in the corner is boring.
10I'd rather be sent to the corner than getting other punishments
17At times yes it is, and at other times, no it is not.
7I do not believe in the "old time" punishments. It doesn't work today.
0I don't think it is a good punishment, because I tried it on my kids and it didn't work.
0It absolutely works! It is the ONLY way to punish your children

posted 12-Nov-2003 8:59am  
It depends on the situation. I see no problem with a child having to stand in the corner......but I don't think it's right to discipline and/or punish a child in front of others. So, if there are other people around, the answer is no. I feel that it could cause the child embarrassment (to have to stand in the corner while others are present) and that is just wrong. Discipline and/or punishment should be a private thing between a parent and a child.
Enheduanna Survey Central Subscriber
posted 12-Nov-2003 9:10am  
I imagine at times it would work and at other times it wouldn't. When I was in 3rd grade, our teacher let us have a "special" recess outside one day, not at the usual time. No one would play with me, so I went off and sat on a bench to pout. I didn't hear the teacher call everyone back in, and when I finally noticed ten minutes later that they'd all gone back inside, I went back to our classroom. The teacher made me stand in the corner with my arms raised over my head for ten minutes as punishment. That sucked, and I was especially bitter because I didn't think I'd done anything wrong. I hadn't disobeyed her--I just hadn't heard. I also think that making a student hold their arms up like that is an inappropriate form of physical punishment. Standing in the corner without it seems fine, though.
posted 12-Nov-2003 9:32am  
It is a great punishment for children of a specific age. It's probably most valuable between the ages of 5 and 10, depending on the child. A time out can also involve having the child sit on a specific chair, or on the stairs. The goal of standing in the corner is to ensure the child has nothing to do for a brief period of time. Sending a child to their room used to serve this purpose to some degree until children got TVs and Stereos and Gameboys and Computers and Playstations in their rooms - hardly a punishment now. Children too young for this punishment cannot stay in the same place for an extended period under their own willpower. When this punishment loses its effectiveness, the appropriate level of punishment typically moves to taking away privileges.
posted 12-Nov-2003 9:40am  
Spanking works well.
(reply to FordGuy) posted 12-Nov-2003 9:47am  
Spanking must be done carefully - never in anger or you may really hurt the child. I don't want to launch into the great spanking debate (where's lisashea when you need her? ;), but I also feel that appropriately administered spanking has its place in child discipline.
bill Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 12-Nov-2003 10:03am  
I don't really know, but I think it could work... temporary exclusion from the group is a good way to give a kid appreciation for the group
posted 12-Nov-2003 10:07am  
Standing in the corner worked on me...but only sometimes because it was boring. It was humiliating to be the identified one not doing the current activity, and having my back turned to the room so that I couldn't even see the activity made it worse yet.
posted 12-Nov-2003 10:19am  
I guess it is ok at times and other times it is not, like if there is company over, then you just send them to their room. It also depends on what they've done too.
(reply to Jody) posted 12-Nov-2003 11:00am  
I agree 100%
posted 12-Nov-2003 11:55am  
posted 12-Nov-2003 12:12pm  
It depends on the child.
I wouldn't find it so bad if I was a child, I can still think in a corner and nobody will bother me (well maybe they would, but the problem would be the other kids, not the corner).
If the child it's very playful and active and not very good at being alone yes, maybe.

posted 12-Nov-2003 12:37pm  
The first 3 in my opinion. Though I do have a funny story about standing in the corner.

When I was in Kindengarten, I did something wrong as I was an ADHD kid, and I was sent to the corner and told to stay I did. Well, time went by, and the school janitor found me, because the teacher forgotme. Needless to say, I obviously missed my bus, so my father had to take time off work and pick me up from school. The cool thing was that Daddy got me some of those PotatoSticks (they were my favorite) and then I got to help him at the garage for the rest of the day smiley:::grin
posted 12-Nov-2003 2:13pm  
i think standin in the korner is a kool punishement.....but thats me, lol, i kould easily keep myself entertained, so i guess it really wouldnt be punishment...hahaha
posted 12-Nov-2003 2:13pm  
I was put in the corner for punishment (babysitter) and I actually enjoyed it. I thought it was better than getting spanked.
Which tells me "time-out" and standing in the corner is little consequence when a child does something wrong. Because I knew when I got spanked that I best not do it again.
The corner was no big deal, it was a rest, but I sure didn't want to get spanked again so I behaved!
posted 12-Nov-2003 3:59pm  
Here's an excerpt from Mothering magazine's book "Natural Family Living" that I strongly agree with:

Parenting without punishment is not just possible-it is the only effective way to discipline your child. Consider the roots of the word discipline: from "disciple," or learner. The goal of discipline is to teach.

Effective discipline is based on loving guidance. It is based on the belief that children are born innately good and that our role as parents is to nurture their spirits as they learn about limits and boundaries, rather than to curb their tendencies toward wrongdoing. Effective discipline presumes that children have reasons for their behavior and that their cooperation can be engaged to solve shared problems.

Forgoing punishment does not mean loss of authority. On the contrary, when you rely on your authority as a parent and your relationship with your child as the basis for problem solving, you actually gain power. When you rely on punishment, you lose power, as punishment must be constantly escalated to work. Effective discipline means teaching your child self-discipline.

But conflicts are a normal part of life. All children have conflicts. They fight with their siblings. They grab things. They do things you don't like. How can you discipline if you don't have punishment to rely on? Here's how: You communicate with your child-you examine the problem and work toward a solution together. You rely on your authority as the parent. You use positive reinforcement, natural consequences, or any of the other alternatives to punishment described below.

Parenting without punishment does not mean being permissive. You still need to be vigilant. But you can use a different language, relating to your children in a cooperative rather than an authoritarian way.

During a conflict, you have a brief moment between your child's action and your reaction, in which you can choose. You can choose to control the situation by punishment. Or, you can choose to go deeper-to use the situation to teach your child, and in the process, to learn something yourself.

I realize I got a little long with that, but reading it really changed my outlook on dealing with conflicts with children.
posted 12-Nov-2003 4:02pm  
I'll admit right up front that I'm very passionate about discipline and punishment issues, but for those spanking advocates out there:
No matter when or how you do it, or for what reason, it is still HITTING YOUR CHILD. And it makes me sick.
posted 12-Nov-2003 4:32pm  
I believe that children are born inherently selfish. We are all focused on ourselves from day one. Children must be taught how to share, taught how to empathize with others. Examining a problem is a nice thought, but it does not teach that all actions have logical consequences. If children's actions have no consequences (particularly negative ones), they may never learn not to do it (particularly before they have mature reasoning skills). As for hitting (spanking) children, I don't encourage it. But when your child runs out in the street often enough and no talking-to or time-out will stop them, I believe spanking can be a fast and effective learning tool.
(reply to Jody) posted 12-Nov-2003 5:05pm  
I agree that learning sharing and empathy is very very important, but I don't see how standing in a corner or being hit accomplishes that (not that I think you're suggesting it does). I agree with the paragraphs I posted, about positive reinforcement and natural consequences. As for spanking, I never have believed, and never will believe that it's a fast or effective way to learn anything positive. The child may not run into the street after being spanked for it, but that's really just a side affect of them being afraid of being hit by their parent again. In the best case scenario, they will get the message that street=bad, but I believe it can always be handled better than that, and my experiences so far have supported that hypothesis. If a two year old cannot be reasoned with, to stay out of the street, well, that may mean a little more work for me, to keep close to her etc., but I'm willing to deal with that. I will not spank. I also think children are far more intelligent than most people give them credit for. If a two year old child in my care runs into the street, she has the capacity to understand the emotions that I convey to her when I'm explaining why people cannot run into the street.
posted 12-Nov-2003 5:12pm  
Handcuffing the kid to his bed has a more dramatic effect. And they can't sneak away when you aren't looking.
posted 12-Nov-2003 7:16pm  
It depends totally on the child. Some children it works for, others, it doesn't.
posted 12-Nov-2003 8:47pm  
You don't have kids, do you?
paulyw Gold Star Survey Creator Happy Birthday to Me
posted 12-Nov-2003 11:39pm  
I remember when I was in 4th grade, we had to stand in the corner as a punishment. I was in special education classes my whole life, but in 3rd and 4th grade, I was in a class with A.D.D (or A.H.D) We were actually given one warning, and after that the teacher will yell "Time Out!!" The funny about this though, is (there were only 7 of us in the classroom) we all had a favorite corner to stand in. For an example, if myself and another kid had to stand in the corner, and it was our favorite corner, we would actually race to that particular corner; therefore, who ever got to the corner first got it!! At times when all the corners are occupied, and there are no more corners available to stand in, (this hardly happened) we had to stick our nose in a small circle (size of a dime). We usually had to do corner time for about five minutes; however, if we acted up in the corner, (such as giggling) we had an additional two minutes The longest I had to stand in the corner was about an hour..
they Survey Central Subscriber Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 13-Nov-2003 2:37am  
It can be effective. I don't use it very often with my kid though. She doesn't do much to get punished for.
posted 13-Nov-2003 4:44am  
I never saw how that worked. As a kid, it used to bring the sought after attention I sought - as it drew attention to you from other classmates.
(reply to Amanda) posted 13-Nov-2003 9:25am  
I knew someone would come out with that. No kids of my own, no, but I've been in childcare for 6 years. I'm qualified to have an opinion on discipline and punishment. I'll get back to you when I do have a child, and let you know how it's working out.
posted 13-Nov-2003 10:39am  
I'm sorry, but childcare is a little different than parenting. Before I had my son, I was a lot like you. I swore that I'd never punish my child, but that changed. I realized early on that sometimes punishment is needed. It breaks my heart to punish my son, but it's something that has to be done. You may not agree with me now, but I can almost guarantee that when you have your own children that you'll change your mind.
posted 13-Nov-2003 10:48am  
i don' t think that it works
posted 13-Nov-2003 12:10pm  
I think "punishment" should be directly related to the wrongdoing. (they should be able to correct themselves.) I don't think I would call it punishment at all. The most effective way to teach a kid right from wrong is to show them.
(reply to Amanda) posted 13-Nov-2003 3:24pm  
I agree that it is different. Never said otherwise. And like I said, I'll let you know how it turns out. I'm not quite sure how early on you *could* recognize that punishment can be needed. I understand the difficulties of raising children more than most people who don't yet have them, IMO. It's important enough to me to put the work into doing what I believe is right. To me, it's not about 'has to be done'. There are certain ways that many parents manipulate and treat their children that I plainly don't agree with, morally (ethically? lol) and these are time-tested views. Being in childcare, I have to come up with some pretty unique and inventive ways of handling conflicts that pop up, first of all because of my beliefs about discipline, and secondly, because I'm not the child's parent. I realize that to the mothers out there, I may sound like a know-it-all who really knows nothing, but please understand that I've given all of this much thought in preparation for getting pregnant and having a child of my own.
posted 13-Nov-2003 4:52pm  
For murder, no.
posted 13-Nov-2003 9:08pm  
Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that you are wrong about your ideas. I believe that everyone has their own opinions. I'm just saying that I used to believe the same as you. It's just that once I had a child, I realized it was so much harder than I ever thought. I am very glad that you've put lots of thought into important issues like this BEFORE you get pregnant. I think that shows that you're serious about being a good mother. I truly hope that your ideas work when you have your own children. Seriously, I'd like to know some of your ideas in more detail. I know that I can always use ideas. I'll never be one to say that my ideas are the ONLY way to go. I think that each child is different. smiley:::smile
jettles Survey Central Subscriber
posted 13-Nov-2003 11:09pm  
(reply to Amanda) posted 14-Nov-2003 6:13pm  
I've got to tell you, reading your comments about Caleb really inspires me, since we're the same age and all. From what I've read, you do such a good job with him! I know a lot of people would look down on you or I for having children young, but you're a good example of how age isn't always an issue. We'll definitely have to discuss! I know I look to you already, since I hope to have a child soon.
posted 14-Nov-2003 6:55pm  
Feel free to email smiley:::smile
(reply to Amanda) posted 14-Nov-2003 7:12pm  
Thank you!
posted 15-Nov-2003 11:36am  
I like it when I'm made to stand in the corner as punishment...but then again, I'm a grown up.
paulyw Gold Star Survey Creator Happy Birthday to Me
(reply to mandy) posted 15-Nov-2003 3:55pm  
I hate to admit it, but when I was in grade school, I liked to stand in the corner for some reason. This was in 4th grade. There was only 7 of us in the classroom, and almost a;; 7 of us liked standing in the corner. For some reason, we liked to make the teacher mad by acting silly, (such as giggling) and being disruptive (such as making noise, which is uncalled for) This was 20 years ago, and I remember quite a bit in that grade.
romkey Survey Central Gold Subscriber
posted 16-Nov-2003 12:32pm  
forms of punishment aren't something I've given a lot of thought to
Biggles Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 16-Nov-2003 3:08pm  
It's better than capital or corporal punishment. But I think sending a kid to their room would be better. Standing in the corner is a school punishment which is more about humiliation than anything else. That's just wrong.
Biggles Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 16-Nov-2003 3:12pm  
Hear hear smiley:::smile

I'm totally anti-smacking too.
(reply to Biggles) posted 16-Nov-2003 5:11pm  
Anti-smackers unite! smiley:::grin
posted 16-Nov-2003 11:16pm  
posted 17-Nov-2003 11:11am  
It depends on the person.
posted 26-Nov-2003 11:24am  
No I thing making them have sex is better (just Joking DUH)
posted 27-Nov-2003 2:54am  
Standing in a corner and sometimes shutting my hyperactive nephew in a room by himself usualy works after a few minuets he says he will be good and the punishment ends, and he will be good for a while.
paulyw Gold Star Survey Creator Happy Birthday to Me
(reply to ihatespiders) posted 28-Nov-2003 10:39am  
It is tricky to handle hyperactive children, I was hyperactive as a child and so was a few in my classroom, which we had to stand in the corner for misbehavior. How old is your nephew, and how often does it work for him?
(reply to paulyw) posted 28-Nov-2003 8:45pm  
My nephew is 5 yrs old. This works almost every time. Because he hates to be board. He also has ADD. Unfortunatly it isnt very long before he acts up again. Standing in the corner or in a room for a few minuets helps him calm down. Drs have tried different meds on him that slow him down a little but he has fragial x syndrome that complicates things, so staying in a corner or a room by himself for more than a few minuets he throws terrible temper tantrums and bangs his head hard on anything injuring himself so this is the only punishment that works for him even if it doesnt last long.
paulyw Gold Star Survey Creator Happy Birthday to Me
posted 28-Nov-2003 11:40pm  
What is x syndrome? I never heard of that before. I had ADD as a child (or it was AHD)
(reply to ihatespiders) posted 29-Nov-2003 12:13pm  
smiley:::frown What a heartbreaking description of events.
posted 29-Nov-2003 9:19pm  
I wish for a cure but theres none in sight smiley:::frown
posted 10-Jan-2004 2:23pm  
Well it always worked for me. I never wanted to do whatever I was being punished for again.
posted 17-Mar-2007 10:44pm  
It can work pretty well. It makes the kid think about his/her behavior.
posted 18-Jan-2008 3:39am  
when I was younger my mum made me stand in the corner when I was naughty, mind you I hated it when she made me do it in front of my friends
posted 10-Jul-2008 11:34pm  
when i had to stand in the corner my dad made me put a dime or a random small object between my nose and the wall and if it fell i was in alot of trouble.
posted 6-Jul-2011 10:46am  
We always had corner time before and after a spanking. Before was about 15 minutes, after was 15 to 30 minutes and after a spanking it was always in the corner bare bottom

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