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multiple19-Oct-2005opinioncrista by votes56659.3%


How long should a couple be together before getting married?

121-2 years
102-5 years
56-12 months
21-3 months
23-6 months
25 or more years

posted 20-Oct-2005 1:40pm  
Other. I don't believe there's a set time. It really depends on the couple. Some couples might be ready in a couple months, some may not be ready for years. Also, people get to know each other at different rates. So, I think it's up to each couple to make that decision for themselves.
posted 20-Oct-2005 2:22pm  
As long as it is good for them.
posted 20-Oct-2005 2:30pm  
Doesn't matter to me...I don't think anyone should ever get married.
posted 20-Oct-2005 3:00pm  
At least here in Cali, 7 years and 364 days. Beyond that you reach 8 years and become 'married' legally anyway.

Meaning, dump the other person before the 8 year mark or you're stuck.
LindaH Bronze Star Survey Creator
(reply to cerealkiller) posted 20-Oct-2005 3:05pm  
States which recognized, but have since abolished common-law marriage, include: California (1895)
posted 20-Oct-2005 3:06pm  
it depends on the couple.
(reply to LindaH) posted 20-Oct-2005 3:09pm  
OK, you're right. then my answer is - never get married
Enheduanna Survey Central Subscriber
posted 20-Oct-2005 3:14pm  
As long as they feel is necessary. And that assumes that they want to get married. For me personally, less than 2 years would feel premature. I think 4 or 5 years is pretty reasonable.
posted 20-Oct-2005 4:57pm  
I woud say at least a year, if not more.
jettles Survey Central Subscriber
posted 20-Oct-2005 7:33pm  
however long they want..................... why get married at all?
posted 20-Oct-2005 7:39pm  
It doesn't really matter.
they Survey Central Subscriber Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 20-Oct-2005 7:43pm  
At least 1-2 years.
posted 20-Oct-2005 8:24pm  
Well, I think they should be running around together as a couple for at least 6 months. They for sure should be living together for 3 months of that to see if they'll compatible.

No hidden, nasty surprises.

I would have been better off had I followed that advice.
posted 20-Oct-2005 8:25pm  
50 years.

By that time, you should have figured out if your partner will drive you to homicide or not. If one of you hasn't killed the other by that point, you probably never will, and it will be safe for you to marry each other.
posted 20-Oct-2005 11:14pm  
I think they should know each other well for at least a year before they even discuss marriage. By the time they are unwrapping the toasters, they should have been together for a year or two at the very least.
posted 21-Oct-2005 12:26am  
I couldn't tell you because this depends on so many factors. There is no set time range, it's what the couple thinks is most appropriate for them.
posted 21-Oct-2005 1:16am  
I've never been engaged, so I don't know.
posted 21-Oct-2005 1:40am  
One year at least, two is better. If I had waited a year before marrying my first mistake, I'd never have gotten that far with him... but then, he didn't turn into Mr. Hyde for about a month after we got married... thank goodness I didn't have kids with him!
posted 21-Oct-2005 7:28am  
1 year and 8 months smile
posted 21-Oct-2005 2:36pm  
There is no time period set in stone. It depends completely on the couple. They alone should decide how long they want to be together before getting married.
posted 21-Oct-2005 6:33pm  
2-5 years
romkey Survey Central Gold Subscriber
posted 21-Oct-2005 8:59pm  
They should wait till they're ready. If you think there's a fixed time period before you're ready, then you're clearly not ready.
posted 22-Oct-2005 3:02am  
I honestly couldn't tell you. It depends on what you think is the right amount of time. I dated my first husband for over a year before we tied the knot, but my second husband and I only dated for a few months before we got married. It depends entirely on your personal situation. At this point, I've been married twice, divorced twice and have no plans to marry again. I don't want to even try and match my father's record of four marriges/divorces, don't even want to come close.
posted 22-Oct-2005 8:19am  
Whatever they want.
posted 22-Oct-2005 11:55am  
I check 2-5 years, at least 2 years.
posted 22-Oct-2005 12:51pm  
how long's a piece of string
posted 22-Oct-2005 4:33pm  
For me it was 1-2 years but in actual time spent ( as I was living in Jamaica and she was in Washington DC) it was probably 1-3 months
(reply to cerealkiller) posted 22-Oct-2005 4:35pm  
CK, How do they define "together" though?... Living in the same house?, having the same bank account?, I am just curious as to what constitutes together? and what if the couple have a difference of opinion by say, a month? etc
posted 23-Oct-2005 10:01am  
Depends on the maturity level. Some people should NEVER get married.
(reply to cabinfever) posted 23-Oct-2005 10:09am  
AMEN!!! My first mistake and I were together for over a year before saying "I DO" the second one it was only 45 days..He would have been perfect except...Mr.Hyde, came out shortly there after. He was a great guy all except that beer drinking temper. Perfect dad, great in the bedroom, GREAT in the kitchen,etc... just had to fight when he was drunk.
posted 23-Oct-2005 1:31pm  
One year at the most a couple should be together before getting married and this is real good survey creator?
(reply to lyndadalee33) posted 23-Oct-2005 1:37pm  
> AMEN!!! My first mistake and I were together for over a year before
> saying "I DO" the second one it was only 45 days..He would have been
> perfect except...Mr.Hyde, came out shortly there after. He was a great
> guy all except that beer drinking temper. Perfect dad, great in the
> bedroom, GREAT in the kitchen,etc... just had to fight when he was
> drunk.

Some men there is just something about them after they drink way to much, and some men are violent! towards us women and they will try and control us , and get us under their feet, a mans attitude changes real fast from a fun and loving guy to > a man who is out of control after 5 or 10 drinks you do not even know him after that it is all over and watch out here he comes
(reply to lyndadalee33) posted 23-Oct-2005 1:44pm  
And when it comes down to the bedroom and may I say that , I am a single woman and some men are very , very strange when it comes to sex and the bedroom and nothing seems to arouse them and they lose all interest in sex , and some men will turn us into sex slaves and tie us to the bed until we are worn out, I mean he needs sex just about every day of the week and it wears on us, and I can become all stretched out from to much sex and very painful and sore
(reply to lyndadalee33) posted 23-Oct-2005 10:04pm  
Well, that sucks... the fighting thing kind of negates all the good stuff, doesn't it? Especially if he wants to drink every weekend, and he wants to fight with you! If it was a once-a-year thing and he fought verbally with a buddy, that could be avoided. But if it's a pattern, then that falls into alcoholism. You don't have to drink every day to be alcoholic. My mom-in-law is in a sitch right now where her hubby has started drinking steadily, and getting nastier as time is going on. I have a sinking feeling that some fecal matter is going to hit the oscillator before long.
posted 24-Oct-2005 3:31am  
This is an interesting question, one where statistics defy logic. Dr, Laura likes long engagements but that actually seems to increase the potential of eventual divorce.

Statistically, the shorter the duration you know each other before marriage the longer the marriage. Short engagements are common in my immediate and extended family. To us, when you find the right one it is hard to wait to start something great.

Like my parents and several cousins. I met my wife less than four months before we wed. No the women were not pregnant. For my wife and I, that was thirteen years ago and we are still happily married. My parent's marriage lasted successfully until death separated them. Whatever your way of thinking is, I hope you find joy in your marriage as we have.
posted 24-Oct-2005 5:13am  
I'll say 2-5 yrs at a minimum, just based on my previous relationship
posted 24-Oct-2005 2:49pm  
however long they think is long enough. the only important thing is that they're getting married because they want to, not because 'everyone else' thinks they should or they've been together long enough.
posted 25-Oct-2005 4:32pm  
There should be no time restraints on love.
posted 29-Oct-2005 8:45pm  
This is probably going to be an unpopular view but I think loads of people who really thought about it before getting married wouldn't get married. I've heard "younger" people refer to their marriage as "the first one" and that they want to "get it out of the way". It's just a given that their first marriage will end in divorce. For this reason I don't believe people should get married after just knowing each other a matter of months. They should take it more seriously if they actually decide to get married and not just do so because it's the "next step".
posted 2-Nov-2005 11:44pm  
My 1st. marriage was to my High School Sweet Heart...2 yrs in HS then we got married after we graduated...lasted less than 1 yr.
2nd marriage.....knew the gut for a long time but didn't date very long..moved in got married,.got separated the next yr. DIVORCED 1 yr. later on scheduel.
3rd. Marriage..Met in Biker Bar, (April) I moved out of state. he visit me in (May)...June we got married....We never dated, because I lived in FL, and he lived in NY.
We've been married 14 yrs. lol
paulyw Gold Star Survey Creator
posted 3-Nov-2005 11:18am  
It all depends on how they can get along. But they should wait at least a year to get married.
posted 8-Nov-2005 4:47pm  
posted 18-Nov-2005 12:34pm  
Depends on the couple.
Sheesh, I should know.
FauxLo Bronze Star Survey Creator
posted 27-Nov-2005 5:28am  
I'm against marriage. I think it's dumb... folks should just be together, if they want to be together. It's just THAT simple.
posted 15-Jul-2008 5:31pm  

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