What kind of wedding ceremony would like to have?

A legal one.

I've answerd according to my preferences at the moment. I'm currently leaning toward a fairly formal wedding, mostly because I think Jason would look in credibly in white tie. I'm planning to wear white, partly because of the tradition, partly because I happen to look really good in white. A friend of mine just got married and she wore a dress made for her from a royal blue silk with gold medallions on it. The groom wore a vest of the same material. That looked really good and achieved the "special" quality without being at all traditional. By the way, the general guideline for attendants is one pair per 50 guests. I'm figuring either one attendant (hi steve!) or 3-4, depending on what my groom wants to do. If you want to geek more about wedding stuff, feel free to email me (hunter@apocalypse.org). Also, I highly recommend the soc.couples.wedding homepage (http://www.wam.umd.edu/~sek/wedding.html).

my dress was green.

Do what you want to. A wedding has to be something that YOU love. You'll only have one wedding (hopefully). It has to be perfect, cause you'll remember it for the rest of your life. You and your fiance should discuss, and the two of you can make the descisions together.

I'm never getting married.

Doesn't really matter since neither Q or myself believe in marriage. But if it becomes easier to get married (for health care coverage or something like that) then my ideal would be a huge cookout/pool party that was extremely casual and I could invite everyone to.

Well, some of this will depends on whether I marry a man or a woman. But I'd ideally want a big wedding, so I could invite all my friends and my relatives, I'd want to wear the white dress, I picture my partner in either another white dress or a gray morning suit (although certainly he or she gets some say in that), lots of flowers. I'd want both male a female attendants - I can think of 4 people offhand that it would mean a lot to have stand up with me. Then lots of food and ballroom dancing. Now all I need is someone to marry!

Use real flowers - fake would ruin EVERYTHING, no bridesmaids, no ushers or best man. Do very personal wedding vows written by groom and bride (critically important). Good food. No dancing. Mellow music which is not too loud so people can talk to each other.
lizzie, oh OK - was imagining plastic (ick).

Bizarre typos :) When I got married the first time it was in a church with a long, white gown. Bridesmaids were in sapphire blue. If I got married again I'd like to get married in a Japanese garden outdoors, again a long white gown with my fiance in a black tux, and the maids in emerald green. I like the formal, elegant style. I'd do the invitations myself but we have high quality printers and software so they'd look professional.

My wedding was actually what I wanted. It was in a baptist church, with a baptist minister. It had about a hundred people. Best man, thwo ushers, brides-maid, and two other brides-maid. I like things simple.

I'm not married, but my fiance and I will be getting married sometime in the future, so it was nice to pick out what I'd _really_ like to have for my wedding. Unfortunately, I can't have the smallish affair I would like, since my fiance has a huge family. My wild dream is to rappel down Lover's Leap at Purgatory Chasm, and get married at the bottom with everyone standing at the top looking down upon the ceremony.

bill: A friend of mine had lovely silk flowers at her ceremony, and it didn't ruin anything. **I would agree that plastic flowers would be dreadful.

comfortable, elegant dress, one that might be worn for some other occasion that isn't a costume party, If I wore a tux, it would be black and conventional. I would not expect my guests to dress up to that degree.

i have always thought that wedding ceremonies, but mostly the reception, are a waste of money....... i think that a celebration can be had at a much smaller cost than is spent. weddings are such big big business these days and too many formal rules of what should and shouldn't be!!!!

The only thing wrong with our ceremony was that not everyone we wanted to be there was able to come.

No tux, rather a kilt and formal jacket (and a muskrat).
**lelle: You're going to wear a kilt to your wedding? Can I come?

At our wedding my husband and the groomsmen wore black morning suitjackets and grey/black pants.

Tom and I married in November and it was a blast. We were married religiously in Macau. (Our legal wedding took place in Hong Kong--it was over in three minutes. We read our "vows" off of pink plexiglass.) Anyway, the real wedding took place in the Cathedral. We had to import our priest from Hong Kong and he did a great job (although he went off on a tangent during the sermon--something about being a martyr???). The only major screw-ups were the music. We had someone set to play piano, but it had been removed. Thus a Chinese guy from the church offered to play a CD. He played the Wedding March for my bridesmaid and my dad and I walked down the aisle to no music. After the ceremony, the same guy played the wrong track and we exited the church to the Ave Maria in Portuguese!!! Weird.

Our reception was great fun--tons of sparkling wine and other drink, incredible music and okay food. The baker who designed the wedding cake (he only spoke Portuguese--we told him that he was obviously an artist and to do what he wanted) baked a truly one of a kind creation. Our wedding cake was sand colored with several different layers including one with a "pond" on it. There were also two "doves" that chirped when you walked by. The actual cake was repulsive but everyone was too tanked to care at that point!

One final highlight. We had guests from all over the world. When we had the garter toss, a Japanese friend took part. (He was single for the night--he didn't really understand the custom.) Iso-San caught the garter. During the bouquet toss, women went down fighting for the flowers. A beautiful eighteen year old Thai friend caught the bouquet and Iso-San was a happy man when he discovered the rest of the custom.

I would want something very simple and outdoors. Spending a lot of money doesn't make the day any more special (or make you more married). My niece recently got married and the reception was at an Inn. Small round tables were set up on the patio and there was a wonderful buffet. We all spent the day dancing, swinging on the swing, talking or just walking the grounds. It was beautiful but a lot of money was spent. Her sister, on the other hand, told people to wear shoes that would be appropriate for hiking. They were married in a clearing in the woods where they spent many hours while dating. The reception was a pig roast with volleyball and frisbee tossing. Both weddings were great but the "nature lovers" had money to put a down payment on a house. One spent money for memories, the other saved it build a life together. Neither is wrong...it's all priorities (or necessity).

The most touching wedding I went to was one where the couple had very little money. The bride's mother made her gown....not a knockout gown but obviously made with love. At each seat at the reception was a piece of the same material about 6" square and an indelible pen. We were to write a message to the couple. The mother was then going to make a quilt for them using the squares. The DJ (a cousin) played a variety of music and taught us line dances. The sweatier the groom got the more obvious it became that he was a volunteer fireman (the printing on his Tshirt attested to that). None of the expensive little touches were there but everyone had a good time (especially the guy in the jeans and cowboy boots) and I've NEVER seen a bride and groom so totally in love with each other.

I think sometimes if people concentrated as much on the marriage as they do on the wedding there would be fewer broken homes.

PHEW! sorry about that....babble babble babble.

I am married. My husband and I married at the county clerk's office in Sacramento. He had just survived a stroke and subsequent brain surgery due to a malformation of veins in his brain. The location, the flowers, the guests ... nothing matter, just that we were bonded legally as much as we were emotionally. After six months or so, we had a big party and went on our honeymoon.

my fiancee and I are planning a celtic wedding. Just the simple catholic ceremony and since my grandma's house is perfect for the reception....a bar-b-que and dancing. Mom's making the invitations (she does stamping and they look professional at about 1/10 the cost), dad's doing the cooking, my aunt is doing the music (since I did it for hers), my cousin is asking around work for tables and chairs and such and the only thing we're doing ourselves is the cake (which mom's doing all but the bottom layer, just because she wants to!!!) and a few little touches like napkins and helping grandma plant January flowers for her garden.

I'm assuming that my spouse's preferences are irrelevant here... for example, that s/he is asking me what I want as part of a process of negotiation or something. All of these preferences are pretty mild and I can go along with pretty much anything (with some exceptions). Given that:
outdoors. If we're really assuming unlimited funds, then way way WAY outdoors -- say, shuttle guests to the top of Mt. Kineo by helicopter, or something.
indifferent to flowers but want natural plants of some kind around.
homemade but good-looking invitations. This would probably involve my computer since that's where I do most of my designing.
large audience... invite everyone who wants to be there. bridesmaids, ringbearers, flowergirls, etc. are pretty irrelevant, but in general I would want to find places in the ritual for the people who matter to me in this context.
no tuxedo or dress at all, though I'm not sure what I *would* want to wear. I'd probably make a ritual out of selecting the garb itself.

I'm married, but didn't have a wedding. I'd want an informal ceremony at our housewarming party, if any. No tux, though -- kilt!
daver: :P :P :P

I think a tuxedo is way too formal for the ceremony I'd want.

Well, I don't care about the wedding - I have to date intentionally decided not to marry my life partner because the marriage thing doesn't matter much to me. I could see having a big party to celebrate my chosen family, though, so I have answered with respect to that. You have left out MUSIC (very important)! And, for a party, FOOD (though that is usually not at the ceremony, I know) and DRINK.

we had a lovely wedding on a shoestring. We had minimal flowers, minimal hors d'oeuvres, a lavendar-frosted sheet cake, music on CDs, no attendants, and a wonderful time. We also designed the ceremony to be brief, yet fully us. We had to make sure the kids could sit through it (they were 3 and 5 at the time). It came to 13 and a half minutes, all told! perfect! Our recessional was the Linus & lucy Peanuts theme!

morning-coat.
Funny. I'm getting married in January and we're just going to the beach with our best man and maid of honor and doin' the deed. Far cry from the 200+-person wedding I WANT. Oh well.

I would have loved a HUGE wedding with all the fancy trimmings, but I never had that. I was always brought up that the bride's family pays for the wedding. My family doesn't have alot of money, so I didn't want to burden them with all of the finances. Needless to say, my husband and I were married at the courthouse. Not the wedding I've always dreamed of, but it was still the most romantic day of my life!

For the guy, a tux with tails

On the beach, on a boat in the ocean, or in the woods... NON religious... very few people in attendance... probably not the traditional style wedding dress and tuxedos

I had my dream wedding. We eloped in Las
Vegas on the spur of the moment, took a limo
to the Chapel of the Bells, and got married
with a Elvis impersonater singing "I can't
help falling in love with you".

NONE!

Courthouse wedding, some flowers, few guests. I don't care if I have a giant budget. Big weddings are a waste of money.