Have you ever cut ties with a close friend, life partner, or family member? Define "cutting ties" as a conscious decision on your part to avoid all contact with a person.

i've stopped talking to people for a while, for various reasons, but not with the intention of never speaking to them again.

This has happened a few times. With my father, because he was dangerous and insane. With a close friend because he was consistently dishonest and abusive, and with a lover because he was abusive and manipulative. It's not something I'm happy about. I wouldn't consider having any association with the lover again, and my father is dead, but other options are open. *** Thinking more about it, the friend cut off ties with me, actually, I didn't with him, although I didn't try to stop him.

I have never cut ties consciously, only drifted apart...

I have cut ties with three of my nine siblings. I have not spoken to any of them in at least eight years. I don't plan on going to their funerals when they finally die either.

I can't think of anyone with whom I have deliberately cut existing ties, certainly no one close. I've let relationships lapse, usually accidentally but deciding upon realizing the lapse not to make an effort to re-establish the relationship. I have had people cut ties with me, for various reasons. Sometimes I've agreed with the reasons, sometimes not, so the level of hurt has varied. Very recently someone with whom I had a falling out (but with whom I was never more an somewhat annoyed) contacted me out of the blue and asked to talk, but I've decided I don't want to talk and told this person that. But this doesn't involve cutting existing ties or even resisting all communication, just not wanting to have a direct conversation, because I think it would only hurt both of us.

I cut ties with a friend in high school because she did some obnoxious things to a mutual friend, and because she broke the bond of trust. "Cutting ties" is a bit of a harsh description in many cases - it is more of a "whatever" kind of thing for me. If I see the person, ok, and if I don't, ok.

I think the answer is no. In most cases it is just a matter of allowed drifting. There are certain people I will make a point to look up if I am in an area, but otherwise, chances I may never speak to/hear from a lot of people. I don't avoid my family, nor do I seek closer contact.

I cut ties with a friend because of personal differences and verbal abusive behavior. Then this person proceeded to call me and come by my house every day for about 4 years. This is probably related to the fact that I hate/fear ringing phones.

ouch. good, but painful survey.

Twice. I cut ties with one of my best friends from high school (if not -the- best -- she's the one who first pulled me out of my 14-year emotional shell) because of one thing she did to a mutual friend that offended me more completely than I thought possible. A few years later, I tried to track her down again (hoping she'd "grown up" a little, or a lot), but I have absolutely no idea how to find her. Her parents are divorced (and I don't know their names) and for all I know she could have moved to another country or gotten married on a whim. Losing touch with her, permanently, still hurts... a decade later. In the other instance... well, have you ever met someone who seemed to think the same way you did, who shared the same outlook on life, and with whom you could talk about anything... and then have all that suddenly change a few weeks later? Yeah. Like that.

*** LISASHEA: I have tried every name-search engine (and a few general-purpose search engines), including phone listings... no go. I strongly suspect that she's (1) not online, (2) nowhere -close- to here, and (3) married... which would explain why someone with such an uncommon name (Terry[ann] Saint Amand) is still impossible to track down. Thanks for the attempted assist, though...

I checked both "because of a person's addictive behavior" and "because of pervasive personal differences". I just can't tell whether the latter is due to the former, but both are certainly true. Good range of answers. ***oops, forgot about my late grandfather, with whom I cut ties because of his weirdness about my sexual orientation, and with whom I reconciled when he apologized. (I don't believe for a moment that he changed, just that he decided not to push it any longer.)

My family is basically in "camps" The "camp" that likes my mother and I and the "camp" that likes my sister. The two do not intermingle because fear of war. It it soo strtessful because I feel like such apawn in the middle. I have also broken of ties to 2 very good friend because I could no longer take their competitive negitivity. Oh it was such a horrible situation!! I am so glad I am out of it, I am glad I had the courage to do it.

Uh, perhaps there are far too many options here...

I recently had to cut ties with an old friend of 15 years. It hurts, and I'm only doing so at his request. OUCHIE.

i'm a master of tie-cutting. it's often my first response to any kind of problem. ***lisashea your link is broken. but thanks anyway

I think I gave my Lori story in the friends section - she had a great boyfriend, lied to everyone that he was a slimy emotionally manipulative bastard, all to justify that she had an affair with a co-worker (nice, white collar) and moved in with him. Her boyfriend was a welder and she thought she "deserved better". I had been best friends with her up until then but this was such an utterly slimy and undeserved action that I couldn't talk to her after it. She felt no remorse, felt she deserved a better boyfriend. She was also a barbie doll girl and everyone fawned all over her, so that probably warped her attitudes.

My mom, tho a communications/psychology major, was/is an alcoholic and used to emotionally beat on my younger sister as the "cause for all the family problems". I was a failure too. When I was 17 (my sister 15) we had enough, I moved in with my soon-to-be husband and my sister moved in with my dad. We talk to her every once in a while, until she starts getting manipulative again, and then we retreat for a while. Strange, since we used to read her textbooks about "dysfunctional families" and wonder how any family could not notice this kind of stuff going on!!

TRUSS: have you tried www.switchboard.com? I've found many old friends through it, quite easily. Joe: fixed :)

Recent development, don't even know if they've noticed yet, tells you how indifferent they were.

I consider friends and such not to really be there anyway. When I meet someone I know I will leave them eventually and am OK with it, I make no connections and leave with only a short word if any. I have moved so many times and move so often it is inevitable. Even the closest people to me I accept I have to leave. I will talk and laugh but I will not love and will not "care" about anyone. But that's the way it has to be. I will not pursue some one, if they don't speak to me or lose interest I will let them go and fade away.

I cut ties because she's a self-centered moron.