What's the first thing you think of asking?

I would hope they were with the person long enough for me to know most of this stuff before they announce they are getting married.

My first question might be 'Are you expecting?' Hopefully I would already know the answer to the other questions.

Are you pregnant. Then do you have a job?

When is the Wedding?

Are you pregnant.

Does he have a job? Hopefully I would already know him enough to not have to ask.

I would ask if she was sure it was what she wanted to do.

How does it feel to be in love? I'm so happy for you! Where are you going to get married? What are your plans? ...honeymoon? What is your mate like? Why do you love about your mate? I miss you since you moved out, but I'm so happy for you! You're growing up! *sniff* You're such a special person, it's great to see things are working out for you. Lets celebrate!

Are you pregnant?

I think if I didn't already know the answers to most of those questions, my first question would be along the lines of, "who is your fiance and why haven't we met them before now?".

I don't have any children, but if I did, I am fairly certain that I wouldn't ask any of these questions. I think I would just be happy for my child, unless I really thought they were making a huge mistake because the person was a big jerk. But if they love each other and treat each other well, that's all I would care about.

Isn't "Are you pregnant" an insulting thing to ask? I would hope that I raised my kids better than to get married just because their girlfriend or my daughter was pregnant. It's a stupid reason to get married and if one of my kids said they were engaged, it's not something I'm going to immediately assume. I'm like Linda-I would hope that I knew them well enough already to not have most of those questions to ask. If I didn't know them, I'd have to ask "How long have you known them" or "how well do you know them?"

If I've never met the person I'd wonder if they were rushing in to something. I might ask how long they have been dating.

Why would I ask any of these questions if I already knew the person my child was getting married to.

I would be SO excited! When my hubby and I announced our wedding, we got a lot of questions along the lines of religion, pregnancy, employment, etc. We promised we would be happy for our children's choice of mate no matter what.

If my son was to the point of marrying someone, I hope I'd know most of these things about them. I probably wouldn't have any questions for him. If he was young, I'd make sure he was truly in love with this person. But, the ultimate decision would be up to him. If he's happy, I'm happy.

So you're going to be happy when Kane marries me?

oh HECKS NO! I don't want him marrying white trash! LOL

Plus wouldn't BOB be jealous????

I wanted to be the queen of his double wide. Is that so wrong?

I think Bob would actually embrace the idea. He's getting tired.

As long as BOB doesn't do ANYTHING to Kane I am ok.

What if he can only afford a single? Will you still want to marry my bean flavored cracker?

I would be thrilled and supportive. I would ask....Are you happy?

Don't worry...Bob isn't equal oppurtunity.

A single? I think not!

Are ya nuts?

Other. I would assume I'd know this man for some time before she announced this.

How old is my 'child'?

Whatever happened to being happy? I wouldn't as any of those racist or judgmental questions.

I am SO glad he isn't EOE. ALSO Kane may live with me his whole life. I don't think you will want to live with me. It would be cool being an instant grandma though!

I have no idea what I would ask. There are too many variables first of all that could determine my first question. And then I'm not a parent either.

Where you gonna live?

Each of our sons and new wives ended up living with us for at least the first two years before they could afford to move out.

In some situations I would say yes, but if it were my daughter and she suddenly said she was getting married, and particularly if she were young I don't think asking 'Are you pregnant?' to be too unreasonable. I know I would ask in a way to try and not sound insulting, like 'You little whore' but so I can say 'You don't have to marry just because you are going to have his baby.'

I would expect it to be likely that I would already know the answers to any of these questions.

Probably... What the hell? If it was random...

Is your mate the same religious beliefs as you I hope so

Other Since my oldest is only in Kindergarten, old I'd think; "Ahh how cute. I did the same thing when I was in Kindergarten." Her name was Julie. I wonder what ever happened to her.

> In some situations I would say yes, but if
> it were my daughter and she suddenly said
> she was getting married, and particularly
> if she were young I don't think asking 'Are
> you pregnant?' to be too unreasonable. I
> know I would ask in a way to try and not
> sound insulting, like 'You little whore'
> but so I can say 'You don't have to marry
> just because you are going to have his baby.'
>

I was really thinking about the first thing a person would ask. If it was a question thrown in after asking other things first, I don't think it seems as insulting.

Presumably I would have met them before and would know all the answers to these questions. Otherwise my first question would be 'Who the hell are you marrying?'

I'd ponder the "do you really think this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?" angle, and "how do yu know if it's really love" and than I would squash their plans if the child cannot prove it's love.

I suppose it would depend on whether it was my son or my daughter. I don't think I would be anxious to ask a lot of questions. I would hope that the first three and fifth questions/options would be things I would already be aware of. I'd like to think that my hypothetical child wouldn't go out and get engaged to someone who was a complete stranger to me. I'd imagine it would be someone they had been seeing for a long time and they would have joined us (hypothetical child's hypothetical mother and I) for family dinners and such. The sixth question/option is very rude! I wouldn't even dream of asking something like that. That's outrageous! The only question/option that remotely resembles a topic I might broach is the "paying for the wedding" one. I wouldn't ask it like that, though. I would think that the next item on the agenda would be a nice little dinner party with the parents of my hypothetical child's spouse to be. Then I would get together with the other father privately, at some point to discuss the financial arrangements involved in the wedding reception and such.

> Isn't "Are you pregnant" an insulting thing to
> ask?

Oh good, it's not just me.

> I know I would ask in
> a way to try and not sound insulting, like 'You
> little whore' but so I can say 'You don't have
> to marry just because you are going to have his
> baby.'

So you would save this little tidbit until she announced her engagement? If that's how you feel, why don't you tell her earlier?

I would have, just as my mother did. Let's say I would re-emphasize it at that point.

Son, Thats THE worst mistake you could make. TRUST me.

Other: I would assume that I have met this mate and would know pretty much all these things..... that being, I would probably say something like:

Wonderful, where are you going to have it?

I asked her when the wedding was and start planning.

Does he or she love you?

Is your mate the same religious belief as you?
Is your mate the same race as you?
Is your mate from the same cultural background as you?
Does your mate have a job?
Are you expecting?