Describe the most annoying coworker you ever had (or have):

Do you ever see the word coworker and think, "What the hell is a cow orker?"
Maybe it's just me...

There's a really annoying guy in my graduate program. He's so full of himself, and likes to sound like he knows so much, but he's really just a huge moron. He's sooooo irritating.

A guy I have to work with now. He's as dumb as a post and inappropriate with his humour and racist. He does things like picks his nose with his tongue, does Orville impressions and talks about his girlfriend way too much for her to be real.

Oh man. Presently, I am situated in a cubicle. The woman two cubicles away from me speaks on the telephone ALL DAY, in a really loud voice. If you can believe this, it seems like she actually WANTS people to hear her business. She has serious issues about impressing people about her status/wealth (of which she has none...she's VERY common.) Furthermore, she speaks SO LOUDLY all day long, that when I am trying to think/concentrate, I am CONSTANTLY distracted.
Furthermore, she has raised her son to be a complete Mama's boy. At the age of 28, he speaks to his mother several times a day. He consults her about life issues that adults should be able to handle on their own. AND, he cannot hold a job. This woman talks incessantly over the telephone and to her co-workers about how mature/well adjusted this boy is.
She is common and boorish.

I used to work with a guy who would move his ring and watch and sniff where they had been on his skin. WEIRDO!!!!

This guy's probably not the most annoying co-worker I've had, but I had to work with him last night and he pissed me off a bit, as he does everytime I'm there with him.
I work at a petrol station two days a week, my shifts are 8 hours long and either 7am til 3pm or 3pm til 11pm. Normally there's two people on at any one time and you take it in turns to do the till, usually in blocks of two hours on, two hours off, so it doesn't get too boring. This guy never lets me get off the till, ever, so I have to stand there (because sitting isn't welcoming!) for 8 hours, either bored out of my brain or going insane because it's so busy. If I do get off the till it's only because I've managed to trick him by going to the toilet and just not coming back!

I know there are many millions of people who have jobs that make mine look like heaven, and aside from this one guy, everyone else is great to work with, but I just hate working with him!

Deep breath.....................rant over.

I suppose the one that really stands out was this enormous bullcrap artist that I worked with at a gas station some 15 years ago. He just droned on incessantly with long-winded tales of such hyperbole it was want to make one blush. They were truly outlandish. It wasn't like he was just making up stories that were vaguely believable; we're talking the realm of fantasy here.

One day I got completely fed up and proceeded to up the ante with a straight-faced tale of outer-space aliens arriving at the party I attended on the previous weekend. I wanted to see if he would call me on it. He was stunned to silence.

Someone who orks cows of course!

There have been several. One dude, before smoking was banned indoors, used to blow smoke in my direction from his desk; one woman next to me used to play her soul music loudly; one guy was really pushy and one thing he'd do would be to play loud Xmas carols in the office. I think supervisors should not allow people to play loud music or whatever in the office because not everyone likes the same kind of music or whatever; they should wear headphones. I think the people who've bugged me most have been aggressive and argumentative types, men and women both.

She thought she was smarter than everyone else, even the managers, and went around nitpicking everything everyone did. She was also LOUD.

A few of them. I dont know which was the most annoying, though. Jill was lazy expecting everyone to do all the hard stuff while she loafed, Oz messed up things I worked on, or things I did to make me have to redo them. Carra never did her job and flirted with guys who'd hang around, leaving other people to take up the slack, then got fired for stealing money. Oh and some people I worked with in a mall in Lufkin were snobs and expected me to do all of the hard stuff, too. I complained to the manager about being there longer and having to do the jobs meant for new people, she didnt care. Then I got laid off and they needed me back in 2 months. I said no flippin way!!! (so I can be the designated mopper and trash lady?! Let the snobs do that stuff now.) hehehehehehe

He was a little jerk who took credit for everyone else's work and somehow had the powers that be convinced he did all the work. He did this to me, my boss (who was his boss at the time) and other fellow employees. This was at a job corps center where we are supposed to teach employability skills and such to youth ages 16-24. Liars make me mad and he was the biggest one, these kids saw this too so he was no role model for sure. They still have his little ADHD self wandering the center and collecting a paycheck on the hard work of others.

I've never really worked. Could be years yet before I do. I'm thinking maybe PhD *then* medical degree, or vice versa......

Someone who reminded me of that bloke out of 'The Office'. He used to sit at his desk in his pin-stripe suit (our office is casual dress and most wear jeans and t-shirt).
He'd put his feet up on the desk and hold a cigar in his mouth - unlit of course. And bark down the phone.
He didn't last long.

The whiney ones,the know-it-alls, and especialy the stinky ones. This one lady at work stunk soooo bad when I was pregnant every time she walked by me, Id start gagging and have to run to the bathroom, my friends thought that was so funny, this person was sent home several times to take a bath. I think the company didnt fire her because they didnt want to get sued, she did her job.

What's orking, though?!

There been so many, don't know where to start.

Orking is when you are on orkut when you should be working.

Anyone with an ego problem--I've dealt with those types before.

I think it's onomatopoeia. Orking cows is simply a lifestyle choice.

Back in the dark ages we had an employee who just plain lied to us about work he'd done. We fired him. There was someone else that I worked with some years later who wanted to develop software but wouldn't tell any of us what it was he wanted to do, because he was afraid we'd make him change his mind about aspects of it. That was an amazing waste of time.

I'm sure I don't know what you mean!

Is it legal?

Call him on it.

I interviewed a woman who fabricated her entire resume and set up family members to answer their cell phone by false comany names until her references were checked etc... She got the job and lost it in about 2 months. I uncovered all of her phonyness and called her on it and she eventually got herself fired for being late.

Orking is when you greet someone from the planet Ork, is it not? "I'm Mork from Ork, Na Nu Na Nu." Isn't that right? I'm not sure it's still legal but was definitely in the 80's.

There was a guy who spoke very loudly, frequently interrupted others and didn't listen very well. Work-wise, he didn't accomplish much. He was so loud that you could generally here him down the hall. In one of these situations, he was loudly saying how he had complained about his salary to our boss but that our boss told him he was already the highest paid in our group. I think that was the year I quit.

Don't forget post-doc.

I just have to say, that is SO gross!
Eck

Na Nu Na Nu !!!

I was so glad when he quit

I'm sure I had some in the past but I work for myself now and can't come up with a story off the top of my head right now.

Ah, very true! That will put it off even longer

I have called him on it more recently - especially with his racist attitudes towards asians. He has a black girlfriend so apparently that means he can be as racist as he likes to everyone else and he is allowed! Unfortunately I'm on my own - my workplace is quite a racist place to work in. Everyone is white except for one pakistani and people make fun of him behind his back.

Only in Oregon, California and Alaska in the states. There aren't any laws against cow orking in Sweden, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Norway, Monaco, the Netherlands, Iceland, New Zealand or Canada.

Is that like cow tipping?

Cow tipping may or may not be an urban myth. I suspect it is actually a rural myth.

We're so backwards here. I hear the mayor of San Francisco is performing cow-orkings, though.

I worked with a guy who only ever talked to me about how my friends who came in were hot, and then asked me out, but not even in person, he had one of our managers do it for him.

I have known people who tried they only succeeded to piss the cow off!!

when people make fun of him you should speak up for him. take a stand and let everyone there know that you find this unjust and offensive. i simply say i find that offensive please don't say that around me. good luck!

I will do from now on definitely. Thanks

Two different ones.

Heather.. who was the boss's daughter and half assed all of her work and somehow made everything I did look like she had a hand in it somehow. dog.

Elaine.. had worked for the company for a few years before I was hired and when I came in, my boss started giving me most of her duties, and preferring my work to hers. She didn't handle it very well and I thought she was going to kill me when the entire office was laid off except for myself.

Did you check out the home page? (link at bottom)

Dan Savage picked it as his "Website of the Week" this week:

http://www.thestranger.com/2004-03-11/savage.html
(link in there too)

That's great!
Have you ever checked out landoverbaptist.com? They're a riot, too.

Hmmmmmm Can't think of one....

mmmmmmm sweet creamy orkut!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This guy was my boss who did not really know much about my job and was always interrupting the work to ask "how's it going?" "what is the update on the work your doing?" The time it took to answer all his stupid questions to make him fill as if he were needed made the job 25% longer. And it didn't matter anyway because regardless of what I told him and he told me I was going to do what I set out to do.

This women who is a real religious zealot. I'm not against religion, but it doesn't really belong in the workplace to the extent that she does.

HAD: this old lady was the office manager of a small car dealership. At the time she was about 70, smoked a pack of Virgina Slims cigarettes a day in her tiny little office and had the most wretched voice. She was the matriarch of the place-Her son was the Service Dept. Manager, and her daughter the AR Manager. My cousin had the job before me, but referred me to the position when she left for college. Amazingly, her and this lady got along great-I remember one year she even got a $2/hr raise! Anyways, I got hired, and it was a totally different story between her & I. One time she accused me of stealing a check. Months alter it showed up, jammed in the back of the register, and of course she didn't even apologize. And when I asked for a raise I think she gave me an extra ten cents/hr or something pathetic like that. What a witch!

I worked with a nurse that was only there for a paycheck and she would do the dumbest, most thoughtless things. We had a leukemia patient that had this slow trickling nose bleed for days. Instead of bumping in there to give him fresh gauze and clean up periodically she decided to tape a giant, thick piece of gauze to his face, covering this nose and mouth. I'd never known anything like it. We all did our best to make sure the nurse manager knew what was going on but she was never fired.

I've never had a truly annoying co-worker.

Ms Know-it-all. She thinks she knows everything, but doesn't.