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Suicide or auto-erotic asphyxiation?

In 1997 rock singer Michael Hutchence was found dead of strangulation. The coroner ruled his death a suicide, and it was recorded as such in official records.

Soon after, his partner Paula Yates, not wanting him to be remembered as having taken his own life, petitioned to have the cause of death changed to "accidental death by means of auto-erotic asphyxiation." In case you don't know, this means strangling yourself while masturbating. Occasionally people who do this pass out during the act and end up dead.

If you were in Michael Hutchence's place, would you rather be remembered as having committed suicide, or having died accidentally from auto-erotic asphyxiation? Assume for the purposes of this survey that your being dead doesn't preclude you from having an opinion on the matter. No other causes of death were proposed in the Hutchence case, therefore no other options are offered here.

Votes	Answer
18	Suicide
7	Auto-erotic asphyxiation
22	Whichever was true
4	I have no preference
2	Other...

User	Comment
mandy	posted 20-Jun-2000 11:36pm What do YOU think I picked?
Matt	(reply to mandy) posted 20-Jun-2000 11:48pm You picked Other, right? lol
Zang	posted 21-Jun-2000 3:59am I can't imagine dying under either of those circumstances. I think suicide is only marginally preferable in terms of how I would want people to think of me. Whatever was true I guess. I'm glad I will never have to make this decision in real life!
ILJ	posted 21-Jun-2000 9:03am Obviously I wouldn't want to be remembered either way. Suicide is not heroic. But given the alternative, I have to take suicide. It would be bad enough for people to think that I was into wrapping a cord around my neck and jacking off; that's just damn creepy. But to be so inept at it (not to mention stupid) that I screwed it up and ended up dead, that's a worse stain I think. When I think of the two celebrity-like people I know of who've died this way, I can't shake the image of a dead guy lying there with his dick in his hand and a stupid look on his face. Who wants to be found that way? I'd be highly irritated if my SO made it her mission to convince the world that I died that way.
supplicant	posted 21-Jun-2000 9:31am Auto-erotic asphyxiation is not merely "strangling yourself while masturbating", it is cutting off air to the brain during sexual activity in order to heighten orgasm. Quite different since A) There is an obvious point, it's not just a weird fetish and B) It's not necessarily a solo act.
ILJ	(reply to supplicant) posted 21-Jun-2000 10:34am I don't believe that's correct. The "auto-" part clearly specifies that it is a self-masturbatory act. Strangulation performed as part of a non-solo sex act is properly referred to as "erotic asphyxiation." I intentionally left out "the point" (the extra orgasm rush) for two reasons: one, the text was getting too long and I had to edit that part out; and two, I didn't want to risk portraying the act in any light that might encourage experimentation among our younger members. We can agree to differ on whether or not it's just a weird fetish.
supplicant	(reply to ILJ) posted 21-Jun-2000 11:17am Hmmm... well I can't say it's exactly an area I'm an expert on But while "auto-" would mean self-regulated surely it doesn't have to mean "solo"? Personally I think leaving out the point biases the question unduly but shrug it doesn't really matter. And to clarify I'm not saying it's not a weird fetish, I'm saying it's not just a weird fetish And to move into openly offensive mode anyone stupid enough to strangle themselves to death whilst getting off is not someone I'm likely to miss seeing alive, young OR old.
romkey	posted 21-Jun-2000 12:55pm Mulder!
ILJ	(reply to supplicant) posted 21-Jun-2000 1:16pm We're basically in agreement I think. It could certainly be done in the presence of another, and in fact that's the only arguably safe way to do it. (I've never done it in case you're wondering, but my morbid curiosity led me to do a little research on the topic. Did you know that AEA fans are almost never black women? Weird!) The cases we hear about, of course, are those where the person died, and those are almost exclusively solo acts. I felt that the way I described it was sufficiently accurate for the purposes of the survey. Getting into the various semantic nuances of erotic asphyxiation would have strayed from the topic, I think. As for leaving out the point, I assumed it would be understood that this was meant to heighten the pleasure of the act, otherwise why would they do it? The mechanics of that heightening didn't seem relevant to me. We agree on your last point, however.
Oscar	posted 21-Jun-2000 1:54pm For myself, I would rather it to be written as suicide.
joachim	(reply to supplicant) posted 21-Jun-2000 2:49pm Why isn't it just a weird fetish? I still don't get that part. I have nothing against weird fetishes, I'm just not clear about what differentiates AEA from them.
ILJ	(reply to joachim) posted 21-Jun-2000 3:46pm If I may, I think I understand the distinction supplicant is making. A fetish, in the sense that supplicant is using the word, would be an attachment to an object or activity that stimulates an individual sexually based solely on psychological factors. I gather that supplicant separates AEA from this class in that it has a direct physical impact on the results of the sex act. So if feet turn you on, that's just a weird fetish. If you stick that foot up your ass to stimulate your prostate, that's...uh...whatever that is. Am I close, supplicant? (I haven't looked up "fetish" in the dictionary and don't care to. Thus I have no idea if supplicant's definition or my interpretation are correct.)
joachim	(reply to ILJ) posted 21-Jun-2000 4:02pm Seems reasonable.
BlueberryMuffin	(reply to supplicant) posted 21-Jun-2000 5:59pm I almost killed myself with auto-erotic asphyxiation once. I was starting to black out and couldn't get the belt I was using loosened. I haven't done it since. I was 11 years old the last time and up until that moment it had never occurred to me that death could result. I was both young and stupid but I hope I've contributed enough to the world that I would have at least been missed.
bill	posted 21-Jun-2000 6:00pm poor Mulder.
mandy	(reply to BlueberryMuffin) posted 21-Jun-2000 6:21pm I'm glad you are still here to tell about it... The thought of you doing that totally makes me cream...but we won't go there... oops...too late! snickers Oh and to all you bois out there making judgements about fetishes and their weirdness...or non weirdness sticks out her tongue
BlueberryMuffin	(reply to mandy) posted 21-Jun-2000 6:47pm Thank you!
ILJ	(reply to mandy) posted 21-Jun-2000 9:09pm Hey, I never said weird was bad!
cody	posted 22-Jun-2000 12:51am Well, It would suck either way, but at least everyone would get a good laugh out of auto-erotica.
supplicant	(reply to ILJ) posted 22-Jun-2000 9:39am Yup, that is the distinction I'm making and was well put. Whether it's fair/right and adheres to dictionary definitions or not I don't know, but it's how I look at it anyway
Maarten	posted 17-Jul-2000 4:24pm Suicide. Dying of auto-erotic asphyxiation is pretty pathetic! On the other hand, so is suicide...
ReKhosGirl4ever	posted 2-Aug-2000 9:09pm Auto-erotic asphyxiation sounds strange.....I'd rather commit suicide...
supplicant	(reply to ReKhosGirl4ever) posted 3-Aug-2000 10:48am Because of course strange is bad, heaven forbid anyone think us different
Guthrie	posted 15-Aug-2000 8:00am I would prefer to be thought of as a great thinker whose despair at the world ended my desire for my place in it. As Michael Hutchence I think I would prefer people to think I was a bit crazy and had risked all for a interesting wank.
angeleyes5491	posted 17-Jul-2006 4:30pm actually I would rather not be known as either, but I guess I would have to choose suicide, even tho there is nothing heroic about that. There is nothing wrong with sexual fetish's but this has gone too far !!!!! This is soooo pathetic !!!! It makes me sick ! My daughter just lost a really good friend to this crap, he was only 14 !!!!!! PATHETIC !!!!!!!!! What a waste for such a pathetis game as they call it !!!!

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